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Terms of Endearment

Important knowledge I have gained throughout my life:

If somebody greets you by calling you "brader", you can bet your sweet ass that he is not your brother and not even a close friend, more of a fly-by-night acquaintance.

You would probably call your very close friend "a total asshole or a total bastard", but someone whom you really despise and just hate their guts: you'd probably refer to them as "a bit of a bastard, or a bit of an asshole".

Somebody who slaps you on your back when greeting you, probably wants you to cough up something.

Seriously, in the end, if you have 5-10 really good close and dependable friends, that's about right.

Somebody whom can greet you by calling out only a phrase of swear words (e.g. TNMCH, KNNCCB, or just a prolonged nonchalant "tiu....") is probably a very very close friend whom you have had a long history.

... and they say don't use swear words in your blog, its unbecoming ... for me, using swear words appropriately is for emphasis and clarity.


ONG said…
Bro., I totally agree with u, long close friends can call us names behind us, worse even our real brothers and sisters can curse our names also, not to mention our own parents like "Stupid Brat" etc..u know what i mean.. :P
rask3 said…
Oh, God. How men rationalise everything. Swearing included, lol.
Salvatore_Dali said…

spoken just like a woman... now we know yr
Mercedez said…
Yes, I do agree with you. I stay away from ppl who:
1) starts to creep up close onto me without saying what s/he wants - except my cat
2) starts calling "terms of endearment" without any real need to – like when I am on my way to the toilet or photocopier. What? You want me to tapau ar? Sorrilah, wrong station or port of call. Now bug off.
3) starts to charm their way to me by making me coffee even though I don’t drink instant or 3-in-1 coffee bags. So there, I have let the world know of my coffee habits.
4) starts to deliver mail into my inbox tray even though the stuff were last year’s news and basically junk. Just an excuse to creep by my office to smile warmly and say irrelevant talk and cheesy smile. I usually tune out mentally and pretend that Ella is blasting her rock music in my office. Then I usually squint and say I need to go because my left ear need cleaning.
5) cleans my desk without my asking for it or knowledge. What? Am I so untidy or are you looking for something or are you worming your way into my good books? My good book (singular) is a tough list and many have fallen off due to their evil ways and evil intentions or lack of ethics or lack of integrity.
6) starts to bring food from home to my desk and says “oh, I made this and I though you may like it” when I do not have a sweet tooth, do not partake food in the office, hates coloured or preserved food, do not take snacks or food in-between meals, do not drink socially or otherwise, do not smoke and hates smart alecs who assumes that I am one of them. I usually says “Thank you but no thank you. However, please feel free to share with ppl outside on your way out” and then direct them out of my office space. If ppl want to share drinks or food with me, they shall soon know that I am not one who is hungry or starved for their offerings.
A word of wisdom: My mum has taught me well not to accept these kind gestures esp if one is not inclined to return the favours. See where this is leading to? Favours. Stay away from being indebted to someone else or you will be wrapped around tightly around their fingers. A bit sad in the world of corporate business and office politics. Stay clean and stay brave. No corruption of any kind – not even free kopi at the local mamaks because I will stick to paying my own bill.
My dad reminded me to be a simple person – stay alert and keep away from evil ppl, stay away from addictions, stay away from “politics”, do not criticise openly, start having a diary to vent your thoughts, stay away from ppl who are always complaining, too cheerful, too naïve to understand, too playful that they do not believe they are wasting their time and stay away from ppl wounded from all these “cloak and daggers” stuff. So who do you mix with? Well, the old, frail, elderly and disabled ppl to start with because generally, they are disadvantaged, more honest, more caring and more blunt than others. However, there is always exception to the rule because too much manja also creates dependency factor. Oh yes, stay away from ppl who are needy and dependent on others for their happiness.
It is good to take up a hobby or start caring for others – animal shelter, hospice teams, care for terminally ill patients or help out in the canteen for disadvantaged ppl. I hate to say this but I learnt more about myself from using my time and energy to help others. My problems are not so bad after all when you see the problems these ppl are facing in their everyday life. I also start a support group for ppl who have fallen prey to loan sharks, bank repossession exercise, poor financial schemes and ripped off with bad insurance policies. So there, there is hope for all of us who feel your pain.

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